02 Sep

I saw this couple in church yesterday that made the melancholy in me (which is like 90% of me) hit its peak. 




After the children left for sunday school (or children’s church whichever you want to call it) the little wife scooted closer to her husband and looked at him with the most adoring face I think I’ve ever seen….but he was completely non-responsive. At first I thought, “oh, that sucks, he didn’t even notice…he’ll notice later”. But a few moments later she moved even closer to him and locked her arm in his. Again he sat motionless; face fixed forward. Finally, the little wife moved in as close to her husband as she possibly could, with one hand clutching his arm and the other rubbing it. She just looked at him waiting for him to acknowledge her advances and at least smile. But alas….there was no reply. So the little wife unlocked her arm, put her hands on her own lap and slowly inched away to her desolate spot on the pew. As a look of devastation swept across her face, she turned to face the front of the church and didn’t make another gesture toward her husband the rest of the service.


The whole time this was happening I wanted to go to the husband and slap him across the face. Don’t you realize what’s going on here man!? Your beautiful wife is sitting there begging for your attention and  you can’t even smile at her. 

It was quite possibly the saddest thing I’ve seen in all my 25 years. 

Admittedly, I do not know what happened before or after the service. All I know is….if that’s what I have to look forward to….maybe I don’t want to get married at all.

I have spent half…no, more than half…of my life being rejected by people who were supposed to stand by me. I definitely don’t want to continue in that.


Posted by on September 2, 2008 in "Debriefings"



2 responses to “Dejected!

  1. Jeff Goins

    September 2, 2008 at 8:09 pm

    This is sad, indeed. My wife often nuzzles up in my arms during church. At first, it surprised me. When we were dating, she did this on occasion, and I struggled with wondering whether or not it was “appropriate.” And then I realized that if God’s children can’t feel comfortable and intimate with one another (without being a distraction to others, of course) in church, then where can they? Moreover, now that we’re married, we often hold hands, put an arm around one another, or she even lays her head on my should fairly often. As you’ve observed, if I were to shun her for doing this, it would be a sin. As Ephesians 5 says, the best example of God’s relationship with his church is thru how a man loves his wife. I fall short of this many times, but I’m learning how important it is for people to see the beauty of Christ’s love in how I lay down my own agenda and regard for what people might think of me… in exchange for simply showing my wife how much I love her. I think God is pleased when we let go out our religiosity and love our loved ones well.

  2. Tj

    September 5, 2008 at 4:35 pm

    We are standing. Love us.


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